When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
