addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
