I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
