ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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