im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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