Yo dont text me then not text me
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
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