just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
