I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize