Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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