Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
i dont even know how to be here
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
