I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
