When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
