This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
