Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
