6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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