Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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