the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
