Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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