His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
