Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
