Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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