all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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