So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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