i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
love makes seman taste better
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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