David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
