yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
