***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
we made out on top of his cat.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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