...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
