..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
