I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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