Do vagina's smell?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize