I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
