ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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