I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
