But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Randomize
