hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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