So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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