I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
