Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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