He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
