thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
