The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
