we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I have post one night stand depression
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
