My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Randomize
