i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
