Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Acid is not a monday night drug
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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