are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
