just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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