Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
so much tequila, so little girl.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Randomize
