As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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