do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
The adults are the big ones right?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
tell me about the fingering
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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